| FINAL!!! |
[Jan. 3rd, 2005|06:49 pm] |
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well i really cannot be assed to keep writing down my thoughts and what i get up to, because to be honest no one actually reads this shit and if they do then they lead a sad life reading someone they dont knows journal, GOOD BYE everybody!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 31st, 2004|06:33 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | guilty | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] | I had the best christmas ever! Well if ya didnt already know jon left yesterday for portsmouth and we broke up, it was a mutral agreement we decided a long term relationship wouldnt work, the thing is i feel really guilty because i am not upset at all, and there is someone new on the scene, is it too soon, should i wait a while to show some kinda respect? i really did love jon and i dont see why i feel like this, i feel so bad! anyway im off to new years party in 10 mins should hopefully good, even tho ive been in bed the past couple of days being ill, dodgy stomach after all the xmas food! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 23rd, 2004|06:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ocean avenue-yellowcard | ] | well....i am kinda happy but doom still hangsover my head, jon still doesnt know whether he is definatly moving to portsmouth, on a happy note i got A/B in my art exam, A on my coursework B on my exam piece, which i was really pleased with, out of my friends i got the highest, woo and in citzenship i got A* on the whole paper i got one thing rong but actually it is right, so i may have full marks on the whole paper....still citzenship is a pointless subject no use at all, still i just happen to be good at it. He he had a mop chop, not too drastic short on top with length underneath its all choppy and wooshy lmao. It actually feels like christmas now, we had christmas songs at work last sat, LAST DAY TIL 17TH JAN WOOOOOO! well i got some christmas presents hehe, i got a top and bath bombs and these amazing lil thingyma bobs from early learning centre from steph, from becki-gloves scarf and a mini boules set HOW FUNKY ASS, my secret santa, which was soph i got smellies set and mange tout woooooooooooo i ate them all in french oops, alice-box of chocs, yardy-a mix c.d that contains richard cheese and songs called 'the vagina song' and 'isnt it awfully swell to have a penis' mi god its hillarious, mel-eeyore set thingy ma jig, stefan-a calender that designed(his photos) tres kool, mark-a hug and a kiss and some flowers, and im still waiting for jons his is coming round tomoz to get his hehe THANKYOU ALL FOR THESE AMAZING THINGS I HOPE YOU ALL LOVED YOUR PRESENTS, i hope big jimmy is good for ya beck rotfl just watched the father of the bride 2 soooooooooo funneh, 'im getting shorter' hehehe im actually laughing soooo loud hehe HAVE A VERY MERRY XMAS EVERYONE AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 16th, 2004|08:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | :(:(:(:(:( | ] |
| [ | music |
| | TBS- i am fred astaire | ] | Fairy tales, your love will be like an imaginary story, you love to love, you believe you have only one soul mate is waiting for you some where in this world and you are sure you will find them one day, and when you do you will make them the happiest in the whole world. Hehe this is my love ^^^, last sentance is true, Well most of you know im feeling shit atm, jon may be moving to portsmouth to live with his dad, hense on the may tho, if he does go it will be in the new year, as soon as im happy something goes and rips out my heart, people say thats long distance relationships can work, i dunno, is it worth it just to spend 1 day a week with the one you love, if you love someone you dont want to be appart and i hate being away from him, GOD, why did his mum have to move in with her boyfriend, now he has no where to live because they r selling their house! well thats my first drama this week second is steph one of my best mates told jon she was 'in love' as she put it with him, jon swears nothing will happen, but thats not my problem its the fact that she knows we r truly in love with eachother and she should respect that, not only may she ruin my relationship with jon but with her too ooohhhh god why is life sooo complicated??? |
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| mixed emotions |
[Dec. 10th, 2004|06:37 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | im thinking too much | ] |
| [ | music |
| | trapt~stories(acoustic) | ] | well, i should be happy but im kinda down, things that have happened this week: *Do I look like a shoulder? Well to my mates i think i do, why is every1 upset atm 7 people in the past 3 days have come to me and cried/told me their problems, i love you all tho i am pretty sick of saying 'everything will be ok' 'dont worry about it' 'im here for you' 'its only mocks'(to 2 people who were upset bout your mocks) 'get over it'
*BLIMEY~i got an A in my french writing and A in my french listening and an A* in my french reading and >>coughs<< a C in my oral BUT AN A* WOOOOOOO
*Fucked my hand up doing lino as development work in art, i cut myself 8 times with it one time the lino tool got stuck in my finger. GOD IM IN SOOOO MUCH PAIN, i had a netball match today aswell and i had to play one handed and i still managed to score to goals and im not even a shooter
*Hehe me and 2 other mates attacked one of our mates with duck tape, put it over their eyebrows and ripped it off hehehe then covered her face with it and forced her to walk round school, god we got a crowd of years sevens who were fascinated with it and then she jumped out on a young small victim and screamed at them then the lil kid just laughs at her (was hillarious)
*my sociolgy coursework is in on friday next week i havent even collected all the data :'( i just wanna cry
*Me and jon are a bit iffy at the moment i love him loads and he loves me but we just arnt spending much time together, tho today at yours was soooo much fun tho my arm fucking kills hehe, i really want to spend all my time with you and now with work on sat and sun now its really hard, I cant wait till tonight shall be good!
*OMG i just found out that one of my best mates was singing at tescos tonight im gunna kill her she didnt tell me....i would of gone and laughed ino im a tru mate hehehe
i prob forgot aload of things but hey! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 7th, 2004|06:34 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | FREEZING IN MY HOUSE | ] | WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO oh yes im on a role i think, i have no idea how i did it but i got an A in my french writing, dont know about my oral though went terrible so il prob end up with a D or summit. OMG we had to give a guide on what we wanna chose at A-level today, and my tutor who is french and teaches french, said to us that taking subjects like art, music and drama are pointless 'it is a waste of brain' as he said so and should concentrate on subjects like french, and me and my mates had a PHAT go at him, wen do we need french unless we go live there or go on holiday there etc. that kinda thing, and i wanna take art because i want to be an interior designer and i have spoken to someone who said the best things to take for what i want to do which is art, bussiness and 2 others of my choice (hopefully they will make a photography class) so HA we won the argument and he didnt and he fell off the table which was soooo funny, went to the leisure centre today and played squash and went swimming, i was moving the shower head and my finger got caught in it and it took a HUGE chunk of my skin out and it immeadiatly started to bleed and wouldnt stop i went back into the pool to see if the supposidly 'Hot' (i dont see it myself) lifeguard could help me, bloody man or should i say boy kept looking at my chest rather than my finger and said he couldnt do anything about it because there wasnt any duty managers wen there were two there and also no one in the pool anyway by now i was feeling kinda faint because i had lost quite alot of blood and in the end i had to go out into public in my bikini and go to reception so they could put a bandage on it BLOODY HELL! |
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| HAPPINESS |
[Dec. 6th, 2004|08:37 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | YAY! | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dont you want me baby~off an advert | ] | well work was tiring on sun, as usual. got home did fuck all, allday, hehehe i was sooooo tired i have an excuse. a mate that i met on hols like 3 years ago and had no contact with since text me saying is this stef, i got totally freaked out cos i had no idea who it was then he was like its matt, iwas like urm how do i know you and they were like we met on hols 3 years ago and it was soooo kool to talk to him. sorry jon i didnt want to see the darkness with ya, thanks for the offer and everything and were willing to pay for me but i dont like them and also in jan wen we see tbs your paying for that too, and i think it would b too much, SWEET MOTHER OF MONGOOSES, i got some mock results today HOW HAPPY AM I??? in science which i didnt revise for i got A/B 2% off A*/A and i have been getting in my modules 3 B's 2 C's and a D and in sociolgy i got a B BUT my teacher missed off the grammer mark....which is an extra 4 marks for spelling and punctuation etc. and if i get all 4 i will get an A i got a C in my yr 10 exams im sooooooooooo happy, hehe my sociology teacher asked for a red pen and i had one but it is one of those ones with 4 colours on and he couldnt put the red back down anyway he gave it back to me then decided he needed it again and this time wen he agave it back he managed to put the red down and i said to him 'you managed to get it down then' my mate burst out laughing and then i caught on it sounded like i was talkin bout his dick lmao, oh my fajeebas i had to do the bleep test in sports studies sooooooooooo bloody hard anyway im off love all to who ever reads this hehehe |
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| WORK~GOD IM SOOO TIRED |
[Dec. 4th, 2004|10:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | weird | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none | ] | well today got up bout 11 and then at 11:45 went to work, i met the students today, omg they are soooo sweet im in love with one of them, sorry jon but this lil spanish guy is amazing he is sooooo funny, but like 10 :( lol, soooooo cute my back kills from mopping and sweeping oh well i got it again at 8:00 tomoz :(:( LMFAO my sis went to an 18th birthday last night and the place the went to gave them gift bags, anyway inside them were giant balloons that make a high pitch noise and fly wen you let go of them anyway we snuck downstairs and let it off in the lounge OMG it was hillarious my dad screamed like a girl and was like hitting it i was in hysterics and yes i am 16 and she is 17 but we can still have fun with balloons right?? anyway bout 10 mins later we did it again and he reacted the same hehe sooooo funny, well im guessing it was one of those you had to be there to find it funny! i cant believe tabby went from x-factor, i do not watch it well....i have watched it a couple of times but i really wanted him to win because he sang my song aerosmith- dont want to miss a thing and thats why he should of won :( my god thats truly an amazing song, my wedding and funeral song! sorry shayne if you read this but you got me soooo angry yesterday, please talk to me again, dont be stubborn be a friend....that sounds sooooo cheesey lol anway i really should go to bed as i have work tomoz, YAY! i have money, but i have to work for it :( |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 3rd, 2004|05:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | im ready to be creative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | embrace~ashes it was on in the car i love that song | ] | Today~oral this morning, OMG i did sooo bad i said that my sis had blue hair and that i worked in a computer, god that would of been a bit of a squish, hehehe. Went shopping this afternoon with beckerdly tweederly awww i saw her kittens soooooo cute, holy macaroni didnt half buy alot, brought bri, loo, and my dad birthday presents, my mum xmas present, part of my sisters xmas present, coz i already brought her an amazing c.d hehe urm brought an amazing funky pen it was a bubble machine, hehe, also my secret santa present, and jons present ;) lmao, OMG found the nicest bag in the world, if ya dont know me i absolutly adore bags, it was sooooo nice but pricey at £42.99 hmmmm xmas present i think, and i found some shoes i like and some boots, im in love i think! i went to the cash machine to check my balance and to top up my fone and i scream "sweet mother of mongooses" again if ya dont no me that is my saying, i had £381.40 i got payed today, and i got my alowence, and i got my insurance money WOOOOO im RICH, well in my eyes i am! is it me or are the welsh really hard to understand, this random welsh dude started talking to me whilst we were queing for b&bs and he wanted something and they didnt have and i wanted a milkshake and the didnt have it, but i didnt have a clue what he was saying to me, the woman who was serving us was americana with a lisp is it just me but its sooooo hard to understand people in this world today, if its not welsh people its americans with lisps god help me! |
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| yesterday-rewritten, coz l/j deleted it |
[Dec. 3rd, 2004|11:25 am] |
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hmmm, well i met up with olly, despite what everyone else thinks, had a GREAT chat, he was telling me bout how is life is a mess, mum have a still born baby, parents divorcing and splitting up with his most recent girlfriend (and i thought i had it bad) he told me how much he missed me and that he knows it is all his fault and wouldnt of been surprised if i didnt turn up, but i did and it was absolutly amazing to meet up with up again. we came back to thornbury after we had been to bristol and just walked about reminising, he really wants to meet you jon and i would love it if you became mates, well we are meeting up next saturday after work if ya wanna join us, PLEASE DO! anyway im really really happy, |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 2nd, 2004|05:51 pm] |
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BLOODY JOURNAL I JUST WROTE AN ENTRY AND IT BLOODY DELETED IT ALL, IF I CAN BE BOTHERED TO WRITE IT AGAIN LATER I WILL, BUT I AM SOOOOOOOOOOO HAPPY |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 1st, 2004|09:24 pm] |
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the dark clouds are clearing all is becoming clear |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 1st, 2004|03:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | indescribable | ] |
| [ | music |
| | yellowcard~23 reminds me of whats going on atm | ] | i spoke to jon on the fone, he seems to think if i do become mates with olly again then it will jepordise our relationship, i love jon sooo much but i havent spoken to olly for 1 year and 4 moths and i have known him my whole life, i have soooo many memories of him in my life and i want future ones, he was such a good friend to me, jon is such a good boyfriend tho, i dont see how you can make me choose between you the guy i love and olly my best friend (well old best friend) i can have the chance to get this back, i know he hurt me and you dont want him to hurt me again, why do all my mates seem to think that me becoming friends with olly is a bad idea, im still not sure wether i will become mates with him yet, but its just the fact that your giving me an ultimatum, it just isnt fair, i feel so upset atm, i just need a hug and for someone to tell me its going to be ok, but you're all voicing your opinions and not helping at all just making me more upset and confused! my life was sooo happy why did everything have to go wrong |
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| how many people wanna ring me! |
[Nov. 30th, 2004|08:43 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | last summer~lost prophets | ] | bloody hell, my fone has been so hot, well jon rang me looooooong chat, i rang becki, bout girlie stuff im worrying bout, god my head is sooo messed up at the mo and i try to talk to shayne bout it and all he could talk bout is egg boxes thanks mate, samzy rang me bout the party i missed :( wish i was there, god i miss u sam i aint seen u in like 5 months due to u going to uni your gunna have to come back ere to see me, your such a great mate and i miss ya, mark rang me telling me how much he loves me WEN WILL YOU LEARN, JUST GET IT INTO YOUR HEAD, I DONT WANT TO BE MEAN, BUT I LOVE JON AND NOTHING IS GUNNA CHANGE THAT, steph rang me saying i cant go round to see her on er birthday coz she was going to london as a surprise bday present to see some show, its your birthday and if i didnt have this exam i could of seen you this morning, abi rang to see if it was ok if her, dan and rosie could come back to mine for lunch during our art exam and course it was hehe the ice machine is outta control, hehe and then finally olly my ex who i wrote about some other time rang me, we have known eachother our whole lives and went out for 6 years then he slept with someone else and we havent spoken since that incidence, really randomly rang me, spoke for ages he appolagised and really misses my friendship we caught up and are hopefully going to see eachother on the thurs, but im really unsure because he hurt me so badly but i do miss his friendship a whole chunk of my life disappeared wen he left my life, im soooo confuzzled HELP ME SOMEONE PLEASE MY LIFE IS A MESS only thing that is right in it is jon |
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| my weekend |
[Nov. 28th, 2004|08:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | lalalalala spice gurls | ] | ABSOLUTLY SHATTERED, fri night-argument with whole family bout going to a party on sat night and also going to jons next weekend for the whole weekend, couldnt sleep as i was crying, i get affected by lil things and i cry hehe, went downstairs, my dad came and appolagised, so then i actually got some sleep. But then had to get up at 6:30 as i needed a shower and i started my new job on sat at 8:00, got driven there by my sis who passed her test last week first time she drove me, bloody hell wasnt half scary. the electrics wernt working at my work so debbie goes dont worry girls, iv got wot every girl should have in her handbag, and pulls out this HUGE torch, god my first day was full of soooo many laughs. then the evening went to my mates party, no we did not dress up as the spice gurls and have a reunion nor did we watch the lion king, nor did we drink hehe, but didnt get to sleep til 7:00 this morning then woke up at 9:35 and havent slept since so im absolutly shattered and im missing jon but hopefully we r meeting up tomoz :D |
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| just a random update |
[Nov. 26th, 2004|06:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | groggy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | natasha bedingfield~unwritten, i love that song | ] | hmmmmmmmmm, im kinda depressed atm, i feel sooooo shit my head is banging, my throat is all blocked up and i cant breath, also i wont see jon til monday now:'( coz he has gone for a long weekend at his dads in portsmouth or somewhere like that! Also i was meant to go to a party tonight of a mate that i aint seeeen in ages coz he started uni, and i cant get there amd im ill and i have to get up at 7:00 because i am working (starting a new job)at 8:00! but then again going to stephs tomoz for a party (tis er bday on tues) HAPPY BIRTHDAY! (not that you will read this coz u dont have a live journal) erm, today spent 3hours on my art, well paper mache'ing and then had a s/s exam finished an hour early so i went home early YAY! only art and french oral to go and then back to hell, the other day was the victorian fair (xmas light switch on)just as amazing as ever, lol, erm stole the coconut shy ball lmao, then went to a field lol, what r the coincedences of meeting loz, amy, and bri in the same field hehehe urm not much else to say but having a great time at toys r us, hehehe |
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| Happiness once again yay! |
[Nov. 21st, 2004|06:58 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | but happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | well not listening 2 any but my sis has linkin park on noooo | ] | well....lots has happened since last time i wrote, cant actually remeber wen it was oh well. good things started to start on friday, i found out i was definately going on the ski-trip WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO you do not know how excited i am about it, couldnt concentrate all exams after that, then went up town with loo and steph~got lush chinky chips and sweet and sour sauce, jay joined us, urm got electricuted by this stabler, that when u staple it gives an electric shock, didnt half bloody hurt (i screamed really loud in this really quiet shop) oooops, went to loos to bake alice a bday cake, had to go home b4 it was finished and loo and jay managed to burn it to a frazzle(well done) evening~had 2 stalls at autumn fair to raise money for our year book, managed to raise £70 on my cake stall and over £100 on the other so in total we av raised round £200 in the past 2 weeks yay! hmmmm later on went to a film premiere(just a mates film) and then a house party afterwards, got absolutly recked and slapped every1 on the ass with a wooden spoon, and started a food fight (that wasnt me ruth if u read this :S)went to jons after that, god i will never b able to go round there ever again, his mum and dad saw me drunk and they were kinda disgusted *ooops* Saturday~jons parents luckily went away for the weekend, phew, went bowling in the afternoon with jon and his mate and girlfriend, well i didnt loose i came 2nd and 3rd didnt get over 100 tho :'( then went back to jons and he cooked me dinner (great cook) then well you know..... sunday stayed at jons doing random things, watchin films, revising, listening to music pretty much the same old same old! now im absolutly shattered, and cant wait to have 3 bloody exams tomoz in one morning YAY! bloody R.E, Citzenship and french writing wooooooooo anyway im off, WHOA i wrote loads! IM GOING SKIING! IM GOING SKIING! IM GOING SKIING |
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| swallow me up now! |
[Nov. 17th, 2004|08:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | gloomy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none im revising | ] | What a shit day, had an exam this morning then went into town with jon and steph and stefan, and saw my ex olly, who i had known all my life and we had always been best friends and went out with eachother for six years, and now we dont even talk to each other coz he slept wiv someone else, anyway wen i saw him i just burst into tears (i no im a wimp) but what made it worse was i was with my current boyfriend jon, and i feel so bad for letting it affect me, coz im over olly and really happy with jon, oh god life is soooo mean to you some times, im kinda feeling a bit down now, i feel really guilty, sorry jon, i love you loads. also got freaked out today, i was home alone, and i was doing my hair, and i kept hearing this moooing noise and i went looking everywhere for the noise but couldnt hear it anymore, so i went and brushed my teeth and i could hear it again, bu couldnt figure out what it was, until i went to pack my bag and realised i had 4 missed calls and a text message and it was my fone vibrating on the table, what a dunce |
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| Happiness :D |
[Nov. 16th, 2004|06:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | boulevard of broken dreams | ] | Wow, this is my first time on here, what a day! firstly my best mate was crying coz her mate ran away, awwwwwww love ya beck! but now is back YAY! another thing hehe raised £24.46 woooooo and then 3p by trying to sell a bucket that went on nearly everyones head on the roof of the alcove, been sat on played as drums cant actually remeber what else but the cheek no one would buy it so we had to give it away lol, BLOODY EXAM this afternoon 2 hours, wtf is a thermologlay centre or summit like that! ahh well im happy now jon was round, he is the most amazing guy in the world, im soooo happy :D and also im on study leave WHOOOOOO:D so iv had a day full of comotion but it has ended on a high! YIPPEEE DOOOO DAAAA hehehe anway my first entry is over not that anyone will probaly read this! |
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